Thursday, February 03, 2005

In an Internet cafe

I am sitting here in an Internet cafe a couple of blocks from our new home after we have talked the guy into letting me connect in with my own computer. It is a problem for them because of their official documents. Here, as the saying goes, if you don't have the right documents, you are less than a bug. Their official documents don't say anything about letting anybody connect in with their own computer. They do talk about people using the internet café’s computers to access the Internet, but not about people using their own computers to access the Internet. That I might pay money to have them do it is not the point. The point is that it is not in the documents so they are uncomfortable with it.

But they ended up letting me do it anyway. A lot of it was the insistence of my wife. She is persuasive.

I am here because we moved the day before yesterday to our new place. This new place is in a new building but that new building does not have any Internet connection. When we asked why not, we were told it is a matter of the documents.

We were supposed to be moved in in December. It is now the first part of February. The building is supposed to be signed off by the various agencies of the government that have a say in who knows what in order for us to get any Internet connection and other services. Someone somewhere has not signed and is probably filibustering to up his fee. This view may be colored somewhat by some heavy duty frustration. I want to blame someone for it and corruption is a god reason I could do this.

But it is not necessarily corruption. It could be the other problem that occurs here too which can be s source of frustration (and a ready-made source, by the way, for corruption.) It is the bureaucracy. The bureaucracy must have its due which means it must have the paperwork together. (What bureaucracy does not thrive on paperwork?) And if the paperwork is not together, the right document, without which you are no more than a bug, will not be issued. And that bureaucracy can work at a glacial pace, grinding its way to a final decision inch by stupid inch.

But it is unsatisfying to rail at an impersonal system. I want to be able to rail at somebody, a readily identifiable somebody. And there may be some evidence as to who the culprit is from a visit my wife made to the government agency in charge. (In charge of the documents.) She had gone there to tell—correction, to ask politely; I want to tell them-- them to turn on the elevator one day. (More on this in a moment.) There was a guy down there at the agency in charge of Okaying the building, that is, signing off on the document, who told my wife that he had his own problems with that building. Now, he may in fact have some problems with the building that a conscientious public servant in any other country might have with the same building, that might prevent him, in good conscience, from signing off on it until they are corrected. But here, this kind of talk is often the opening salvo of a series of negotiations on the price of his signature.

So I am railing against him.

But we are now in and like the amount of space we have. Nice. The only problems are the lack of services that we have come to count on for living in this century. The first of these is hot water. Here they do not have a hot water heater in the various homes. They have central heating. By central is meant very central, out of the building central, in its own heating plant building central. And that building is controlled by the government. In order for us to get hot water, it has to be turned on by the government. And in order for it to be turned on by the government, they must have the proper documents. (Rail, rail.)

And we live on the 13th floor. This is not a problem because we are superstitious. This is a problem because we are not Olympic athletes. The point is that the elevator is only working from the first floor. There is a button on the 13th which, when pushed, does nothing. This has meant that we ride up with the stuff we have. But when we need to go down, we walk the 26 flights.

This may seem a small matter. Walking down with not much stuff is a lot better than walking up with a lot of stuff. And this is true. But the elevator does not work all the time from the first floor. It works only until around 4 p.m. If you get caught out after 4 p.m. you will be left having to hoof it the 26 flights back up. And in the morning, it will work sometimes from 9:30 a.m. but oftentimes not until 10:30. Why? The guy doesn’t get there to turn it on.

On the weekend, though, the schedule is different. On Saturdays, it works from the same time in the morning, a ballpark 10 a.m. But it is shut off at 1 p.m. And on Sundays, we have no elevator at all. This means that the elevator works when people are not here and doesn’t work when people are. Go figure.

So why won’t they just turn it on and leave it on? The reason is the documents. You must have the right documents for the elevator can be turned on.

They would say that the fact it is even on at all is an accommodation to the people here. And there is something to that. Of course, wanting to rail, I would say that the building owners found the right person who was able to get it turned on for those periods absent any documents—they can only go so far at their pay grade. This would mean a fee of course.

It could be worse though. We have a friend who bought a place in another area of town. My wife asked them about the elevator. Turns out they didn’t have one for 6 months after they moved in. And they live on the 19th floor—nice view by the way-- and have a baby. “But that is all behind us now.” Sounds like it was a very bad experience.

Which brings us to the Internet. We were told that we could not get any Internet connection until the proper documents were signed. That is of course the whole problem and the reason why are I am now in the Internet café. I think I might have to get cozy here. I could be making my way back to this place for some time. I hope not but I have to steel myself for the possibility.

I shouldn’t rail too much though in the end. Even with all the problems, we still like the place. But this is just another reminder that this is not the West. And maybe at the end of six months we will be able to say that it is all behind us too.

183 comments:

Ron said...

Good grief, Scott!

Your ‘documents’ and corruption story makes me wonder why there hasn’t been a revolution long before the Orange... one that threw all bureaucrats out of office (that have anything to do with new buildings) - for rank stupidity beyond belief!

Your tale is most saddening. I can see that Yushchenko has more work to do than anyone here might have imagined! Unfortunately, he’ll probably not get Ukraine even to the edge of the twilight-zone of Soviet dunderheadedness that obviously infests the place - much less completely out of that crippling nonsense.

The problem is, as I began to suspect a couple of months ago, far too many tin-horn government ‘crats have their hands out looking for bribes - and they purposely set up measures to increase the likelihood of being offered... many.

One quick solution - a penalty of 5 to 25 years for anyone taking one - and cash rewards for anyone who can prove that a ‘crat took a bribe. I’ll have to drop a bug in Viktor’s ear, urging him to lead the people out of such nonsense-hell.

Second solution - fire 50 percent of government employees, close half of government agencies - and offer low, and zero, interest government loans for start-up businesses - particularly in the building industry.

How on earth do Ukrainians think anyone would ever be interested in coming there to begin a business - with this kind of utter incompetence to deal with?!

Ron said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ron said...

A P.S. - - -

High-rise apartment buildings with without elevators, hot water or heat... because government controls these essentials! Hospitals that do not have FOOD, toilet paper or medical IV capability! (See THIS)

The questions have to arise... does perhaps, the government of Ukraine also control the availability of medicine, dietary supplements, insurance, firearms, automobiles, aircraft, boats, ATVs and the full range of electronic and telecommunications products?

Next, I suspect, I’ll hear that ‘documents’ must be in order to check into a hotel (that has documents to sign for room service) - and of course, there will be no heat in the room, since I didn’t request it, and sign the appropriate documents in time for the Ukraine Hotel Agency to approve them.

Must one pay tax in restaurants for meals there?

I know I have to pay tax in hotels and motels here. Tax on phone calls, tax on lighting on my street that I didn’t ask for, tax on breathing is next, I’m sure. We pay tax to support a Border Patrol - but the borders are wide open - the ‘patrol’ is told to do nothing to prevent entry - on pain of dismissal. So, I can’t laugh too hard at elevators that don’t work there.

Maybe it’s time for an Orange revolution here in the US... in fact, I think one is not far off!


8^)

Anonymous said...

Scott, you poor dude. But your wife is right -"insistence" is key. It may be uncomfortable and feel just plain wrong (why insist for something that simply should be?) because it works wonders. I think that people in post-Soviet countries have it down to an Olympic skill or they would never survive. I saw how insistence got me airline tickets (at an airline counter), railway tickets at a rail ticket office, and allowed a woman and child to remain on a bus - the last one for the day (yes, they had tickets but it was against the rules for people to stand) - the woman simply would not get off the bus. She asked, begged, yelled, cried, cajoled, until the bus driver relented. And the problems you have experienced is exactly why those who can afford to do so, have purchased their apartments and renovated them completely.

And yes, at one time could not register at a hotel without proper documents and had to register with police as soon as you arrived in town. During Soviet era - no such thing as independent travel at all - all was handled by Intourist. In hotel you had a floor person who watched your comings and goings. On the bus you had a person who 'helped' the tour representative. You had a person who ony appeared on the chartered flight - which was only for the tour. And should you decide not to participate in today's activities and go off on your own, you could be brought in for questioning by the militia.

Scott, see Neeka's Backlog - for her piece about the new apt. building and the lady that runs the place. Every building had a person who ran the place. So your place must be new property and there is no such person. Hopefully there will be someone.

In terms of why no Orange Revolution before? The level of persecution and the insidiousness of the KGB was something fierce - millions perished, thousands jailed, deported, ... Reprisals were harsh and swift. Even a suspicion was enough to convict. Soviet system was such an authoritarian regime that it 14 years and still trying to make people free and reverse 70 years plus of horror. People endured what they felt they could not change. Stoicism.

And for someone to step out - like the woman who interprets the news in sign language - it is an act of courage and bravery.

A story about stoicism - - -
I first read about Oksana Sukhanova, the UA migrant worker in her twenties, who came to Ireland for work and who who lost her legs to frostbite from sleeping outside in the cold, Ireland, in the following article -http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/story.jsp?story=605202

More on her story in
http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/story.jsp?story=606692

And
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/northern_ireland/4224651.stm

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The CommunityExpress pilot program is designed to spur economic development and job creation in untapped rural and inner city communities by providing loans and technical assistance. Loan proceeds may be used for most business purposes, including start-up, expansion, equipment purchases, working capital, inventory or real-estate acquisitions.
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While CommunityExpress is similar to SBAExpress, here are some differences:

• CommunityExpress focuses on predesignated geographic areas that primarily low- and moderate-income urban and rural areas.

• The maximum loan amount under CommunityExpress is $250,000.

• CommunityExpress lenders, together with the National Community Reinvestment Coalition, provide hands-on technical training and support, both before and after loan closings, through community-based, nonprofit NCRC member organizations.

7(m) Microloan Program

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